Spy Blunder: Wrong Dad

Early morning. All sounds fell silent. It was filled with an extremely serious spy thriller atmosphere. A gleaming black SUV is parked outside a quiet suburban house, its engine idling. Two "agents" wearing headphones were speaking in a low, tense voice. "The target is inside." "There's movement in the kitchen." "Standby." Inside the house—a father in sweatpants stands in front of the refrigerator, staring inside as if top-secret information is hiding inside. The camera cuts back to the outside of the house. "The target has activated the refrigeration device." "Peak heat detected." Inside, he took out some milk. He shook it. Smell it. Made a funny face. Outside, an agent squinted at the tablet. "He is analyzing chemical integrity." The front door creaked open. The father, wearing mismatched slippers, walked out onto the porch to get the newspaper. The two agents immediately became alert. "The target is leaving the residence." "Visual confirmation. He looks ...... Not very stable. " The father awkwardly waved at them. They froze. He squinted. "Are you from DoorDash?" (Silence) They looked at each other. Inside the SUV, the third "commander" shouted over the radio: "Retreat. Got the house wrong again. " The agents slowly took off their sunglasses. The father shrugged and walked back inside. The camera cuts to the kitchen. He sat at the dining table eating cereal. Turn on the TV. Breaking News: "International espionage organization arrested after monitoring a random suburban father for three consecutive days." He chewed the cereal loudly. Milk dripped down his chin. He sighed. "Finally."